DEAR ABBY: I’ve been married to “George” for 35 years. I used to be pregnant once I married. We had dated handiest 5 months. We got here from households that believed you needed to “do the right thing” and get married. I like my husband, however by no means as deeply as I believed I will have to.
I had emotions for anyone else (“Dennis”) earlier than I were given married, however we had been at all times in several relationships once we’d see each and every alternative. He used to be my husband’s very best guy at our marriage ceremony, they usually had been buddies for a few years. He moved away and we had no longer unmistakable each and every alternative for 25 years.
Dennis and I latterly reconnected, and once we first noticed each and every alternative, it used to be like I used to be crash by way of a truck filled with feelings.
Dennis makes me really feel tactics I by no means felt earlier than. We’ve lengthy talks about how a lot we neglected each and every alternative. We will inform each and every alternative the rest. I’m the happiest I’ve ever been in my moment, however as soon as once more, issues are sophisticated. I nonetheless are living with my husband, even though I’m within the technique of transferring out once I will. Dennis has to deal his mom and will’t simply proceed off.
We need to be in combination. We’ve by no means accomplished the rest greater than hug and percentage passionate kisses. George will likely be harm, however will have to I retain hanging my happiness latter simply to thrill anyone else? When do I need to feel free? — ABOUT TO FLEE
DEAR ABOUT TO FLEE: You might have a proper to feel free and so does George. Have you ever and Dennis been discussing marriage all through any of the ones lengthy talks? Does George know you might be making plans to travel out and why? How does Dennis’ mom (who could be very a lot within the image) really feel about his romance with you? How do you propose to assistance your self in case your romance will have to no longer determine?
Remember to have solutions to those questions earlier than you collect your luggage, as a result of in the event you don’t, you could in finding you slammed the door on a ample marriage to a person whose handiest flaw used to be that he wasn’t Dennis.
DEAR ABBY: My ex-husband is loss of life of most cancers. I were given pregnant in a while earlier than we divorced. I left him as a result of he bodily, psychologically and emotionally abused me. I by no means informed him about his son. In truth, I lied and informed him the kid used to be anyone else’s. I did it to offer protection to our kid.
Now that my ex is loss of life, I believe in charge. He by no means had any alternative kids. Will have to I inform him he has a son? — FEELING GUILTY IN THE MIDWEST
DEAR FEELING GUILTY: That’s a fascinating query. My first response is to let sound asleep canines lie. Out of your description of your ex-husband, he would have impaired the kid as a pawn to additional abuse you. On the other hand, you didn’t point out whether or not your son is aware of who his father is. If he does, he may need to meet him earlier than he expires. That is one thing handiest you’ll come to a decision.
Pricey Abby is written by way of Abigail Van Buren, sometimes called Jeanne Phillips, and used to be based by way of her mom, Pauline Phillips. Touch Pricey Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Field 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
