DEAR ABBY: The daughter of a pal is getting married and despatched an electronic mail announcement with a hyperlink to look at a livestream of the rite. I’ve by no means been invited to NOT attend an match sooner than, and albeit, my emotions are harm. (My husband used to be an implausible artist. Must I ship a livestream of others taking part in his paintings in particular person?)
Does etiquette require I ship a marriage reward? I’d’ve understood no longer being invited in the event that they had been protecting it a miniature affair, however inviting a widow to eyewitness a pal’s emotional, romantic presen within the solitude of her house turns out heartless. Am I out of contact with what’s socially appropriate? — NOT GOING IN TEXAS
DEAR NOT GOING: If the marriage is being held a ways from the place you are living, next the invitation to livestream used to be most certainly an try to be thoughtful. Nowadays, many significant occasions are livestreamed, together with funerals and memorials. Should you would to find looking at the rite miserable and like to not “tune in,” next don’t do it. And, disagree, you aren’t required to ship a present. (A candy e-card congratulating the couple can be a pleasing formality.)
DEAR ABBY: My brother is married to a really nice lady. It’s the second one marriage for each, they usually each paintings, despite the fact that they don’t deal with cash neatly. They have got traveled to public occasions and ended up operating out of cash for foods, automotive leases, and so on.
My sister-in-law heard a couple of ladies commute my daughters-in-law, a couple of similar buddies and I will be able to be taking. She has invited herself alongside, and I don’t know the way to with politeness inform her she will be able to’t come until she has the cash up entrance to pay her percentage. It will execute me to harm her emotions. Please advise. — RESPONSIBLE LADY OUT WEST
DEAR LADY: Who has paid for the meals and automotive leases that this couple didn’t have the cash to safe? Have been the ones relations ever reimbursed? Except you wish to have to base the invoice to your SIL in this commute (to which she has invited herself), you’ll must summon up the braveness to inform her you’ll in no way be doing that. If her emotions are harm whilst you atmosphere the visible (that you’re not a pushover), so be it.
DEAR ABBY: I’m a 79-year-old lady. I’ve had a pal since highschool who’s 5 months more youthful than I’m. A couple of weeks, every so often months, sooner than my birthday rolls round, she’ll pop out with feedback about her being a number of months more youthful. Those feedback hover between sarcastic and simply basic heartless.
I feel she thinks she’s being bright, however upcoming a few years of this, it’s not humorous. When she makes a remark this yr about my BIG birthday, what may my comeback be, in essence, telling her to knock it off? — SAME AGE IN FLORIDA
DEAR SAME AGE: How about this, spoken with a grin in fact: “Oh, Honey, age is only a number. My birthday may come before yours, but you are right behind me. I’m trying out the number before you get there. At this point, I consider each day a blessing and so should you.”
Expensive Abby is written through Abigail Van Buren, often referred to as Jeanne Phillips, and used to be based through her mom, Pauline Phillips. Touch Expensive Abby at http://www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Field 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
